Q: Q's

Overall: 2.7

No surprise here, but when it came time to pick a place to hit up for the letter "Q," we went to Q's since Quizno's unfortunately doesn't have a liquor license (http://www.qsbilliardclub.com/main.htm). But, seeing that Q's is a sports bar and we're in the middle of the football season, it was the perfect place to be.

Despite not showing up wearing our favorite jerseys like EVERYONE else in the place, we miraculously got a decent table and immediately started grubbing on their $1 Sunday bbq of hotdogs and chicken that Q's puts on every Sunday during football season. The price was right, the food was great…. so onto their bloody marys.

I had just run 6 miles before showing up, so I was super dehydrated and would've pounded the remnants of the bar mats had you put it in a pint glass before me. So, I sucked down my BM within 30 seconds and honest to God, didn't even taste it. However, my fellow taster said it lacked any real flavor and labeled it "bland." The only adjective I could come up with was "wet."

The mediocre BM wasn't the end of the world. There was a great vibe for a Sunday Football Funday and we'll be back!

Spice: 2.0
Complexity: 2.5

Garnishes: 3.5
Overall taste: 2.0
Price: 3.5

Overall: 2.7

P: Penthouse

Overall: 4.0

After months off from drinking bloody marys, we were ready to get out there and make up for lost time at the Penthouse Restaurant, on the roof of the beautiful Huntley Hotel in Santa Monica(http://www.thehuntleyhotel.com/). Known for having the best view of any bathroom in Los Angeles (the last stalls of the men’s and ladies’ rooms overlook the ocean), the Penthouse is a great place to go for a drink and to check out the great 360 degree view of Los Angeles, but not if you are drinking on a budget. The blood mary was very good; not stand out of a crowd good, but the kind of bloody mary with a complete and well balanced taste that I would keep drinking could I afford to. In addition to very tasty bloody marys, the Penthouse offers some yummy (but again, overpriced) appetizers and a nice drink list, including an amazing Lychee Martini. I highly recommend you go to this beautifully decorated and hip spot with your out-of-town friends to impress them with the great places you know in L.A... but make sure they pick up the bill.

Spice: 3.75
Complexity: 4.5
Garnishes: 3.5

Overall taste: 4.25
Price: 2.0

Overall: 4.0

O: Outlaws Bar & Grill

Overall: 3.2

People receive nicknames for a reason - because they fit. Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson. "Magic" Johnson. Isaac "Black Moses" Hayes. And following suit, self-proclaimed "grubbin' an a guzzlin' establishment" Outlaws Bar & Grill (http://www.outlawsrestaurant.com/) certainly lives up to its nickname. Before I go on about their bloody marys, please note that this place serves a 2 lb hamburger. And now...moving on.

The bloody marys were great - well-seasoned, priced and spiced. I'm pretty sure they were pretty powerful, though I shouldn't be the judge. In anticipation of tackling the 2 lb-er, I ran 6 miles the morning of in preparation. I'm sorry to have let my fellow blogger and thousands of blog followers down, but when push came to shove I ordered the lox. Nobody was more disappointed in myself than I.

I'm a fan of this place - wooden floors that look like you can toss your peanut shells on, a full bar, their own parking lot and GREAT food. I'll be back.

1. Spice - 3.5
2. Complexity - 3.0
3. Garnishes - 2.0
4. Overall Taste - 4.0
5. Price - 3.5

Overall: 3.2

N = Nightmare, otherwise known as Newsroom Café

Overall: 0

You know when you have one of those days where everything just sucks? That was my life the day we went to the Newsroom Café in Beverly Hills.
My co-blogger and I started the day off hungover. We had been out the previous night for one of our fellow drinkers’ bachelorette party and had drank our body weight in various forms of alcohol. We got so drunk that we stole a camera, threatened to punch people in the face, and kissed an unattractive stranger (and by “we” I mean my co-blogger).
But I digress.
We arrived in the late afternoon for brunch and ordered bloody marys as we waited at the middle of a table for six, across from each other, for our friends to arrive. We were told by our waiter that the Newsroom had run out of their bloody mary mix and there would be none for us that day. After tossing some serious attitude at our braces-wearing waiter, against our better instincts and because we thought our friends would be joining us soon, we decided to stay.
After perusing the Newsroom’s long, disjointed hodge-podge of a menu, we settled on two dishes we thought would be fun: a spicy curry shrimp dish and an omelet with smoked salmon. I think this may have been the grossest food I have ever eaten in my life. I am nauseous thinking about it now.
By the end of our meal, we still hadn't heard from the others who were supposed to join us, so we left: bloody mary-less, angry, bitter, still very hungover, and now a bit nauseous. The only cure we could come up with for our misery was dessert at Diddy Riese, http://www.diddyriese.com, the Westwood mainstay. It worked (for the most part) – two fresh cookies with a scoop of Dreyers ice cream for a mere buck fiddy made things better, but could not make up for the fact that the Newsroom sucks.

1. Spice - 0.0
2. Complexity - 0.0
3. Garnishes - 0.0
4. Overall Taste - 0.0
5. Price - 0.0

Overall: 0.0

M: Magnolia

Overall: 2.25

While the food at Magnolia was decent, the "M" in Magnolia does not stand for Memorable when it comes to their bloody mary, although I do remember being hit hard by it. The bloody mary was strong and the taste was good, but it's definitely not one of the best we had.

Magnolia is typically known as a cool dinner/loungey spot, but when you walk in for brunch it looks like you're at the club at 2:00 a.m. after last call when they've just cranked up the lights. However, the food was more than adequate and the cocktails (in which we partook post bloody mary) were delicious, and, like the bloody mary, very strong.

The most amazing thing about our meal was by far the dessert: the chocolate cookie mint chocolate chip ice cream sandwich. A taste of heaven - and cut into four perfect pieces for me and my 3 friends. Sorry we didn't tip you extra for the TLC with the dessert, Waitress, but we're in a recession!

1. Spice - 2.0
2. Complexity - 2.0
3. Garnishes - 3.0
4. Overall Taste - 2.25
5. Price - 2.0

Overall: 2.25

L: The Lobster

Overall: 4.25

Maybe I was delirious from the pain of having just fallen off my bike, and maybe my drinking partner was still drunk from her trip to the Caribbean, but one thing I am sure of is that the bloody mary at The Lobster, http://www.thelobster.com/, was by far the most beautiful bloody mary we have seen thus far. The “beauty” I refer to was the huge cocktail shrimp jutting out of the bloody mary, accompanied by his good friends celery stalk and olives. The bloody mary itself was more than good, with a nice spice and complexity, and went perfectly with our meal of Lobster Cocktail, Crab Enchiladas and Fried Calamari. Although the menu is in general a bit overpriced, the portions were not stingy and we were very satisfied with our food choices. If you can plan far enough in advance to get a window table at The Lobster, do it – the view of the Santa Monica Pier and the ocean is unbeatable, especially at sunset.

The only thing negative I will say about our experience is that our crazy eyed waitress with the penetrating stare took about 5 minutes too long to take our drink orders, but after that, she was on top of it. Just don’t look her straight in the eye…

1. Spice - 4.0
2. Complexity - 4.0
3. Garnishes - 5.0
4. Overall Taste - 4.0
5. Price - 3.5

Overall: 4.25

K: Kitchen 24

Overall: 3.6

Look, I love Barney's Beanery and all other party eateries in WeHo/HW, but sometimes you just want to have brunch without catching an STD. Jokes aside (I'm not joking - have you been to Barney's?) Kitchen 24 (kitchen24.info) is cut from a different cloth. Pristine white countertops and a bright room are always a nice surprise, especially in a neighborhood known for its nightlife. (Note: we were there at 3 p.m. rather than 3 a.m. when the bars get out and a DJ is spinning. So yes, you can probably scratch most of this paragraph.)

The bloody marys were hands down the largest I've ever gotten at a restaurant; I feel like it was a half gallon, respectively. The quantity over quality rule doesn't apply here - they were really good. And bonus: I learned Baltimore's nickname is "Charm City" when our MD-based bartender explained why he rimmed the glasses with Old Bay. So, add that to the useless info file in which I specialize.

I would absolutely come back here, and hope to someday in the near future. Breakfast served all day and night, full bar, DJ, dessert cocktails, open 24/7… the list of good things just doesn't stop.

1. Spice - 3.0
2. Complexity - 3.25
3. Garnishes - 4.0
4. Overall Taste - 3.75
5. Price - 4.0

Overall: 3.6

J: Joe's Restaurant

Overall: 3.1

Remember that guy you knew some years back... You’d heard rumors that he was amazing, and you thought he looked pretty good but you just weren’t interested in him. That is, until that day when you got drunk and finally hooked up with him and realized he was f-in amazing and couldn’t stop stalking him? Well, that’s what Joe’s Restaurant (www.joesrestaurant.com/) is like.

I’d heard from a number of people that this place was great for dinner and brunch, but until I tasted Joe’s for myself, I was not a true believer. Now, I’m obsessed.

Nestled at the top of quaint and hip Abbot Kinney, Joe’s provides the perfect ambiance for a laid back, but high quality Sunday brunch. For an average of about $17 (w/o drinks, that is) Joe’s brunch includes a tasty choice of appetizer (spiced milk and granola - mmm mmm), a hearty and delicious main course (huevos rancheros = good), and all you can eat of the most amazing banana bread with butter and jam.

Oh right – the blood marys: The bloody marys were ok. Our charming, ever present, waiter told us that the house recipe was great. Not sure I would completely agree with his assessment.
In closing, the blood marys were decent, but for brunch, Joe’s just might be the best I ever had…

1. Spice - 3.25
2. Complexity - 3.0
3. Garnishes - 3.0
4. Overall Taste - 3.0
5. Price - 3.25

Overall: 3.1

I: I Cugini

Overall: 2.8

If you want to have a stunning Sunday brunch with a gourmet buffet, live jazz, view of the ocean and don't plan on drinking bloody marys, I Cugini (http://www.blogger.com/www.icugini.com/) is for you. If bloodys are an intricate part of your Sunday jazz brunch as they are for us, save yourself the cash and reread our posting for "H".

I Cugini is hands down the nicest restaurant we've gone to so far. There's a strong possibility I was swayed by their bathroom's cloth towels, endless chocolate covered strawberries and the excitement at the possibility of a 4 hour Sunday happy hour, and gave a higher rating than what is deserved.

In struggling to stay grounded and focus on our bloody mary mission, I will say this: the bloody marys are only mediocre. The presentation was lovely as you can see in the picture, but they tasted as though the only seasoning added was pepper - the black-peppered rim, while very unique, didn't make the situation any better.

So, if you want to gorge on great food with solid live jazz playing, do it to it. Just order a mimosa and look like a bitch.

1. Spice - 1.5
2. Complexity - 4.0
3. Garnishes - 4.0
4. Overall Taste - 2.0
5. Price - 2.5

Overall: 2.8

H: House of Blues

Overall grade: 3.4

It's a little known fact, but each House of Blues (hob.com/la) holds a Gospel Brunch every Sunday. Though, regardless of what city you're in, as soon as you step inside you warp into the South. People are dressed in their Sunday best, lining up for all-you-can-eat cheese grits, jambalaya and biscuits & gravy….not the mention the $10 all-you-can-drink bloody marys, hence the reason we rolled to the Sunset Strip at the crack of 1:00 p.m. last Sunday morning.

The gospel choir encouraged us all to dance and wave our napkins like we were second lining down the streets of New Orleans, and apparently it's something they do at every show. I'm not going to lie - this part can be a little rough if you decided to binge drink for 12 hours the day before to celebrate St. Patty's Day as some people in our group did (um….me). But, for people that didn't have to make themselves vomit in the bathroom when they first arrived, this is actually really fun.

The bloody marys were decent here. While they weren't over the top fantastic, whenever you hear all-you-can-anything, you can already assume it isn't going to be top of the line. But, they certainly got the job done; I enjoyed them and our waiter was all over us, making sure our cups were never empty.

1. Spice - 2.5

2. Complexity - 2.75
3. Garnishes - 3.5

4. Overall Taste - 3.25

5. Price - 5.0

Overall: 3.4

G: Genghis Cohen

Overall Grade: 1.5

We debated why the name of this restaurant seemed to combine two flavorful cultures. One theory that arose was that when there were no other restaurants open on Christmas in colonial times, the early Jewish settlers began their love affair with General Tso’s Chicken and Pork Fried Rice. Whatever the reason, my people love Chinese food and Genghis Cohen (http://www.genghiscohen.com/) did not disappoint when it came to food.

On the other hand, the bloody marys were a true disappointment...like when your son changes his major from pre-med to sociology and starts dating a shiksa.

Here’s why the bloody mary was bad:

Lame garnish – just a lime and no olive – WTF?;

Weak spice with no yummy horseradish flavor;

And finally, simply, the taste was just bad– just tobasco and tomato juice.

Don’t be tricked by the fancy description on the drink menu for the New York Spicy Bloody Mary but do partake in the number of drinks on the “Foo Foo Drink Menu” that are amazing; i.e. the Lounge Lizard, Passion Fruit Margarita, or Mai Tai. We recommend you stop by and enjoy the 4 pm early bird special over some yummy drinks at Genghis Cohen, but just say no to the bloody mary.

1. Spice - 1.0

2. Complexity - 1.0

3. Garnishes - 1.0

4. Overall Taste - 1.5

5. Price - 3.0

Overall: 1.5

F: The Farm of Beverly Hills at LA Live

Overall Grade: 4.17

The Farm of Beverly Hills (http://www.thefarmofbeverlyhills.com/) is typically known for it's baked goods. (brownies, cookies, etc.) Word to the wise: The Farm that's located inside LA Live should officially be known for it's Bloody Marys. It's fair to say that these are the best we've had since embarking on our A-Z journey.

Why are they claiming the #1 spot, you ask...? Everything about them was just right - taste, spice variation, size, price, celery salt-salted rim option… I could go on. Okay...I will and I'll add alcohol content. As soon as I was done with my first and on to my second, it hit me like a punch in the face and low and behold, I was drunk. Good news/bad news -- bad news: I drove home afterwards. Good news: I didn't get a DUI. (notice the good news ISN'T that I didn't kill myself and/or passenger; let's be honest, we all know that deep down we really only care about our driving and arrest records.)

The food was also more than decent and it was a surprise bonus that they had a brunch option at 2 p.m. on a Monday afternoon. Bottom line: The Farm is strongly recommended.

1. Spice - 4.25
2. Complexity - 4.28
3. Garnishes - 4.0
4. Overall Taste - 4.7
5. Price - 3.6

Overall: 4.17

E: El Cholo (Santa Monica)

Overall Grade: 2.9

When you think bloody marys, you probably don’t think Mexican restaurant, and in choosing El Cholo as our bloody mary outing, neither did we. In fact, the plan was to find a fun place to drink heavily to celebrate the three day weekend in honor of Martin Luther King, Jr., the upcoming inauguration, and our right as Americans to get drunk on a Sunday afternoon. In so doing, we discovered a pretty decent bloody mary.

To be honest, the details of the bloody mary are kind of blurry. It was the first in a long line of drinks (which were actually pretty good – margaritas, pomegranate margaritas, sangria – mmm sangria). From what I remember, there was some tomatoey/v-8-ish base, an olive, some spices, some pepper, and a pretty smooth finish. Given the number of drinks we all had that day and the amount of food we ate, for the life of me I can’t tell you from the bill whether the price of the bloody mary was reasonable or not, but my instincts tell me it was.

Our waitress was great – kind of a spacey yet subtley witty girl who kept us full with drinks and food and was pleasant all 7 hours we spent there despite the fact that El Cholo forces her to wear a very silly House on the Prairie-like dress. We thoroughly enjoyed our drinking session at El Cholo. It has a laidback but fun party atmosphere, above decent food, and an overall decent bloody mary.

1. Spice - 2.25
2. Complexity - 3
3. Garnishes - 3
4. Overall Taste - 3.25
5. Price - ??

Overall:

D: Duke's

Overall: 3.0

D is for Duke's (http://www.dukesmalibu.com/).

I grew up watching the television show The Price Is Right and ever since, it's been a life motto of mine. If something I typically wouldn't buy is on sale or just obviously underpriced, more often than not I announce "the price is right!" and make the purchase. So, like other things in my life, TPIR applies to the bloody marys one finds at Duke's. No, they're not the best but for $6 in Los Angeles, I say drink up. Dukes provides the type of bloody mary you drink one of and don't regret, but you won't be begging for more.

The bloody marys themselves were your average and standard bloody mary. Nothing that will blow you out of the water, but all in all, nothing to complain about. Celery stalk? Check. Seasoned tomato juice? Check. The bartender definitely followed the rules, but never took the step to add a little lagniappe to made it his own. We were a little upset about the lack of olives, and, although we were excited to find peppercinis in our drinks, one of us received a pathetic, shrivelled up one which is just wrong.

You can't beat the view at Duke's, though, and it's one of those places that even if the food is mediocre (is wasn't - definitely a small step higher than that), you'll undoubtedly be going back for more sooner or later. Also, they have a fantastic beach drinks menu and the drinks on that menu are strong. Sitting right off the beach drinking a strong mai tai made me feel like I was on spring break. Had there been a wet t-shirt contest, I might have even thrown my hands in the air and said "why not?" but...maybe next trip.

1. Spice - 2.125
2. Complexity - 2.5
3. Garnishes - 3.0
4. Overall Taste - 2.75
5. Price - 4.5

Overall: 3.0

C: Chateau Marmont

(Note that this review is of the restaurant at Chateau Marmont, not to be confused with Bar Marmont next door)

Overall Grade: 1.9

Chateau Marmont, www.chateaumarmont.com, a West Hollywood Institution known for celebrity partying, debauchery, and at some unfortunate times, celebrity death, is not, and should not, be known for its bloody marys. I'm pretty easy when it comes to bloody marys - give me a nice thick and spicy bloody mary, or even a mediocre bloody mary with some serious condiments (think slim jims), and I will love that bloody mary as if it were my own child. The blood mary at Chateau Marmont was neither. It was watery, weak, lacked complexity - the spice was derived almost completely from black pepper - and literally left a bad taste in my mouth. The ultimate sign of my dislike of the bloody mary: even I, a self-proclaimed serious Sunday day drinker, had to resort to a mimosa for my second drink. The horror. Chateau Marmont should be embarrassed to charge $13.50 for such a weak bloody mary.

That said, regardless of the fact that CM makes a weak and overpriced bloody mary, the food at the restaurant is super! The delicious french fries lived up to their reputation, and we were all happy with our lunch sandwiches. Drinks at CM may cost you an arm and a leg, but the food was actually reasonably priced. A delicious Steak-Um like steak sandwich cost $17, compared to $18 for a mimosa.

Needless to say, Chateau Marmont is beautiful and you never know what celebrity you might see lounging in the hotel lobby or eating at the restaurant. Definitely go eat there, but make sure you arrive liquored up so you don't have to spend your whole paycheck on overpriced drinks and bad bloody marys!

1. Spice - 1.8
2. Complexity - 1.8
3. Garnishes - 2.2
4. Overall Taste - 2.3
5. Price - 1.5

Overall: 1.9